Unlock Your Potential: Achieve Fitness Success in Just 10 Minutes a Day

Hey there, busy bee! Are you tired of feeling like you don’t have enough time to prioritize your fitness goals? Do you find yourself scrolling through Instagram, seeing people’s impressive workout routines, and thinking, “I wish I had time for that”? Well, what if I told you that you could achieve fitness success in just 10 Minutes a day? Yes, you read that right—10 Minutes! Intrigued? Keep reading to explore the concept of maximizing your fitness within a limited timeframe.

Exercises using pelvic toner

Picture this: you wake up in the morning feeling refreshed and ready to tackle the day. But instead of hitting snooze on your alarm for the fifth time, you jump out of bed excited to start your day with a quick, energizing workout. No more guilt about skipping the gym or not having enough time for exercise. With just 10 Minutes a day, you can transform your body and your mindset. Sounds too good to be true? Let me assure you, it’s not!

Click here to tone thighs and shape your body in 10 Minutes. ..

The Problem

Let’s address the elephant in the room—time. Yebo! You heard me. ..In today’s fast-paced world, finding time for fitness can feel like an impossible task. Between work, family, social commitments, and everything else on your plate, it’s no wonder that exercise often gets pushed to the bottom of the priority list. But here’s the thing: neglecting your health and well-being only leads to more stress and burnout in the long run. So, how do we break free from this cycle and make fitness a sustainable part of our daily routine? The answer lies in embracing the power of short, effective workouts.

Now, I know what you might be thinking: “Can I really get results from just 10 Minutes of exercise?” Trust me, I get it. It sounds too good to be true. But hear me out. It’s not about the quantity of time you spend working out; it’s about the quality. By focusing on high-intensity interval training (HIIT) and incorporating compound movements, you can maximize your workout efficiency and torch calories in a fraction of the time. Plus, short bursts of exercise have been shown to boost metabolism, increase energy levels, and improve overall fitness—all in just a few minutes a day. 

But wait, there’s more! The beauty of the 10-minute workout is its versatility. Whether you’re a morning person who loves to start the day with a sweat session or a night owl looking to unwind before bed, you can customize your workout to fit your schedule and preferences. Plus, with countless free apps and online resources offering guided workouts, you’ll never have to worry about getting bored or stuck in a rut. So, what are you waiting for? Let’s dive into how you can make the most of those precious 10 Minutes and achieve fitness success on your terms.

Click here to tone thighs and shape your body in 10 Minutes. ..

Solution

First things first, let’s break down what a typical 10-minute workout looks like. Think of it as a series of high-intensity exercises performed back-to-back with minimal rest in between. You’ll want to choose a mix of cardio, strength, and core exercises to target different muscle groups and keep your heart rate elevated. Some popular options include jumping jacks, squats, push-ups, mountain climbers, and plank variations. The key is to push yourself to your limits during each 30-second interval, knowing that you only have a short amount of time to make every second count.

Conclusion

So, there you have it—fitness success in just 10 Minutes a day. It may sound too good to be true, but trust me, it’s entirely within reach.

When it comes to achieving fitness success in a short time, it’s important to adopt a balanced approach that prioritizes consistency and incorporates overall lifestyle habits. While 10-minute workouts can be an effective and efficient way to get started, they should be viewed as a valuable tool in your fitness journey rather than the sole solution. Here are some key points to consider:

  1. Consistency is Key: Consistency is more important than the duration of your workouts. Committing to regular 10-minute workouts will yield better results than sporadic longer sessions. Aim to incorporate these short bursts of activity into your daily routine.
  2. Lifestyle Habits Matter: Fitness success is not just about exercise; it’s about adopting healthy lifestyle habits. Focus on factors such as nutrition, sleep, hydration, and stress management alongside your 10-minute workouts. These habits will support your overall well-being and enhance the effectiveness of your exercise routine.
  3. Customize Your Approach: Everyone’s fitness journey is unique, so find what works best for you. Experiment with different types of exercises, workout timings, and intensities to discover what you enjoy and what fits into your schedule. By personalizing your approach, you’ll be more likely to stick with it in the long run.
  4. Build on Progress: As you become more comfortable with your 10-minute workouts, gradually increase the intensity or duration to challenge yourself further. This progressive approach will help you continue improving and avoid plateauing.
  5. Stay Motivated: Keep your motivation high by setting small goals and celebrating milestones along the way. Use positive reinforcement techniques such as rewarding yourself after completing a certain number of workouts or achieving specific fitness targets.

That said, by prioritizing short and effective workouts whilst making the most of every minute can help you unlock your potential and achieve your fitness goals, no matter how busy your schedule may be. So, what are you waiting for? Lace up those sneakers, set your timer, and get ready to sweat your way to a happier, healthier you!

Click here to tone thighs and shape your body in 10 Minutes. ..

How to discipline your wife

How to discipline your wife

Does God want husbands to ignore rebellion in their wives? Is the husband/wife relationship the only hierarchal relationship where the authority (the husband) has no power to discipline? Or does God give husbands the authority to discipline their wives? If so how can a Christian husband discipline his wife in an effective way that is pleasing to God?

When we hear the word discipline in the context of wives this can be a scary term for many. It invokes images of husbands beating their wives and knocking them around or locking them in closets. It might invoke images of husbands standing over their wives yelling and screaming at them and using all kinds of obscenities. This is not the type of discipline that we are talking about in a Biblical context. Men who behave in such ways will answer to God for this abusive treatment of their wives.

Arguments against the discipline of wives by their husbands

Before we can get into how to discipline your wife as a Christian husband we need to address the arguments against any form of discipline by husbands toward their wives.

Argument #1 A Partner cannot discipline their other partner

The first and most common argument against Christian husband’s disciplining their wives is the belief that a husband and wife are equal partners in marriage. The Bible does not show marriage as a partnership, but rather a Patriarchy (male lead hierarchy). See my post “Is Marriage a Partnership or a Patriarchy?” for all the Scriptures that present marriage as a Patriarchy and not a partnership.

Argument #2 Discipline infantilizes a wife

Some would argue that if a man disciplines his wife in any way that this is treating her (an adult) as a child. This could not be further from the truth. The discipline of a wife is certainly different than that of a child and we will discuss that later in this post.

But discipline is something that applies to adults as well as children. Governments have the power to discipline their adult citizens, military commanders have the ability to discipline adults under their command, Churches have the power to discipline their adult members, and employers have the right to discipline their adult employees. Discipline applies to all of us as adults – both men and women.

No one would argue against discipline in these other spheres of authority or say that it infantilizes these adults.   Certainly there is also the potential to abuse one’s authority and discipline in wrong ways, but the exercise of discipline itself is not wrong, only the abuse of it is.

Argument #3 A wife’s submission to her husband is voluntary, therefore he cannot discipline her

Even some Christian complementarians and others who believe in male headship in marriage reject the husband’s right and responsibility to discipline his wife. They do so based on their belief that while a wife is commanded by God to submit to her husband, this is a voluntary submission on her part and cannot be compelled from her husband.

So in their reasoning if a husband cannot compel his wife’s submission, he cannot discipline her for failure to submit to his leadership. I have shown how the Scriptures refute the idea that a wife’s submission is voluntary but rather they show that her submission is mandatory and synonymous with obedience. See my previous post “Should a Christian husband make his wife submit?” for more on this subject.

Argument #4 Christ does not discipline his bride

Some Christians, both complementarians and egalitarians, have attempted to argue that since we have no examples of Christ disciplining his bride (which is the Church) that husbands ought not to discipline their wives. This is actually not true.

Throughout the Scriptures God pictures his relationship with his people in two primary ways. The Bible pictures our relationship with God as individuals as that of a Father and his children. The Bible pictures God’s relationship with his people as a group as that of a husband and a wife with God being the husband and the people of God being his wife.

In the Old Testament God made a covenant with and married Israel as a nation (Ezekiel 16:1-14). Later he shows he had to divorce Israel because she failed to repent of her wicked ways and return to him (Jeremiah 3:8) despite the discipline that he had brought on Israel.

In the New Testament God has a new bride which is foretold in the Old Testament prophecies. But the Church (which a new body compromised of the remnant of Israel and Gentile believers) is pictured as bride that is betrothed to her husband which is Jesus Christ (II Corinthians 11:2). The marriage and consummation of the Church with Christ is seen in the marriage supper of the lamb in Revelation 19:9.

Even as a betrothed bride, Christ disciplined his Church through his Apostles who acted as the protector and guides of his bride.

“I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him.” – II Corinthians 11:2 (NIV)

“What do you prefer? Shall I come to you with a rod of discipline, or shall I come in love and with a gentle spirit?” – I Corinthians 4:21 (NIV)

When speaking to his seven churches in Revelation (chapters 2 & 3) Christ rebukes and disciplines all but one because of their failings and Christ says this to his churches:

“Those whom I love I rebuke and discipline. So be earnest and repent.” – Revelation 3:19 (NIV)

So my point in all this is – Those who say God does not discipline his bride are ignoring passages of Scripture that show both in his previous marriage to Israel as well as his current betrothal to the Church that he in fact does discipline his bride.

My position on wife spanking

While I do not support all the methods prescribed by Christian Domestic Discipline (CDD) movement (a group that advocates for wife spanking and other physical discipline toward wives) I do not think wife spanking by itself is sinful.  I do not practice this myself at this time with my wife.  But I do know some godly Christian couples that use this in their marriage with the wife’s consent.  I have written an entire article on this subject that you can read “Does the Bible allow a husband to spank his wife?

Different Types of Discipline for Different Spheres of Authority

The discipline from each authority that God has established looks very different. The types of discipline that a government can bring on its citizens looks very different than the discipline that church authorities can bring on their members. The discipline of an employer toward his employees looks very different than the discipline of parents toward their children. In the same way a husband’s discipline toward his wife will look different that the discipline used in these other spheres of authority.

But what all these spheres of authority have in common is this:

In every sphere of authority God has established that the authority has not only the right, but the duty to discipline those under their authority.

Discipline makes us a better person

The Bible has a lot to say about discipline. These are just a few of those passages.

“Whoever heeds discipline shows the way to life, but whoever ignores correction leads others astray.” – Proverbs 10:17 (NIV)

“Whoever disregards discipline comes to poverty and shame, but whoever heeds correction is honored.” – Proverbs 13:18 (NIV)

“Those who disregard discipline despise themselves, but the one who heeds correction gains understanding.” – Proverbs 15:32 (NIV)

Discipline should be measured

“I am with you and will save you,’ declares the Lord. ‘Though I completely destroy all the nations among which I scatter you, I will not completely destroy you. I will discipline you but only in due measure; I will not let you go entirely unpunished.’” – Jeremiah 30:11 (NIV)

As husbands our discipline should always start off gently and then move toward harder forms of discipline. So for instance, if your wife rarely speaks in a disrespectful or demeaning tone to you then if she slips up gently let her know that her tone was demeaning or disrespectful. If she apologizes then no further action is needed.

But what if your wife is acting defiant or publicly speaks disrespectfully toward you as her husband? In this case a Christian husband may be compelled to use harder forms of discipline.

Discipline is about holiness

Christ did not sacrifice himself for his bride (the Church) in order for her to follow her own selfish ways, but rather he sacrificed himself to make her holy.

25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.”

– Ephesians 5:25-27(KJV)

As we previously mentioned God says this to his churches in Revelation:

“As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent.” Revelation 3:19 (KJV)

No man who truly loves his wife takes pleasure in disciplining her. We as Christian’s husbands naturally want to see our wives happy we don’t want to rock the boat needlessly. This is why discipline on the part of a husband toward his wife if he is truly acting in love is a sacrifice on his part. It saddens him to have to take these measures with his wife whom he loves.

Discipline is about maintaining Order

I think the comparison of the family structure to military ranks is both Biblical as hupotasso (the Biblical term for submission in marriage) is a military term and it helps us to understand the discipline in the home as well.

God is like our General (4 star). In the home the husband would be like a Lieutenant General (3 star), and the wife would be like a Major General (2 star). The children would be the enlisted men. Imagine that a 4 star General came along and saw a 2 star General publically degrading her 3 star General in front of other officers or the enlisted men. What do you think the response would be from that 4 star General?

That 4 star General would first scold the 2 star General for her disrespect and then he would probably scold the 3 star General for allowing the disrespect to go on. It is the same with God as he looks at the relationships of husbands and wives.

He has given us different positions and we are to exercise and play out those parts he has given us. As a Christian husband you cannot allow your wife’s demeaning or disrespectful behavior to go unchecked because it is an affront to God’s established order. You are responsible for teaching both your wife and your children the ways of God. You are equally responsible for disciplining your wife and children when they rebel against God’s ways.

So now that we have addressed the arguments against a Christian husband disciplining his wife as well as the intended purpose of a husband disciplining his wife we can now look at practical examples of how a Christian husband can discipline his wife.

7 Ways to Discipline Your Wife

Discipline toward your wife should always start with the gentlest approach first and only move toward harder forms of discipline if the gentle approach does not yield results. Warnings should always be given before harder types of discipline are implemented. You should always pray and seek the Lord’s guidance before bringing these types of discipline on his wife.

Here are 7 ways you can discipline your wife if a gentle rebuke does not work:

#1 For Disrespect

If your wife is speaking in disrespectful and demeaning ways in public in front of others (whether this is toward you or others) this might require a public rebuke of her tone and actions.

#2 For Overspending

If your wife is spending money against your wishes – this may require confiscation of her credit cards and ATM cards. Of course this can be done in measured amounts. Perhaps you might just take away one or two cards that she has abused and if her spending continues to get out of control you would move toward removing the ATM card as well. This does not necessarily mean she would have no money, but you could give her a cash allowance each week.

#3 For failing to care for your children or contradicting your authority with your children

If your wife is failing to do her duties as a mother toward your children or she is continuing to contradict your authority with the children then perhaps you might put off buying that new car for her and have her continue driving her older car for a while as long as it is safe for her to drive. If you have to purchase another car – you could downgrade the type of car she will be able to get or buy her a used one instead. Maybe you put off the purchase of that new dishwasher she has been wanting.

#4 For too much TV watching

If your wife is watching too much TV you could cancel the cable or satellite TV and just have antenna service.

#5 For too much online time

If your wife is spending too much time online (like Facebook or other social outlets or online shopping) then if she does not respond to your warnings about this you could change your internet code on your router so that her devices will not have access to the internet.

#6 For neglect of the home

Maybe your wife is not watching too much TV or spending too much time online but she is still neglectful toward her duties in your home. If your wife is being neglectful of her duties to care for your home then you might put off that new living room furniture set you have been talking about or those new window dressings she has been wanting.

#7 For sexual denial

If your wife is un-submissive in the sexual arena and chronically denies your sexual advances (without legitimate medical or psychological reasons for doing so) then perhaps that upcoming trip you were going to take her on gets canceled. Maybe that wardrobe upgrade your wife was looking forward to gets downsized or canceled. The Bible says a man has to supply his wife with clothing, but it does not say it has to be the expensive clothing she wants!

Some of these disciplinary procedures may affect the family as a whole, but sometimes it is necessary to do this in an attempt to bring your wife to repentance.

These are just some examples of non-abusive ways that a Christian husband can discipline his wife in a way that honors God and his design for the home.

Conclusion

God not only give husbands the power to discipline their wives, but he also gives them to the duty to do this. Men should not discipline their wives out some sort of power trip or prideful arrogance. Instead men should discipline their wives from a place of love in order to bring about holiness and order in their homes. Even if a wife rejects her husband’s discipline as Israel did God as her husband – he should still discipline her and pray that God will bring his wife to repentance

How to Stop Loving Someone Who Doesn’t Love You

1. Recognize that pain is normal. When you love someone who doesn’t love you back, it hurts. It turns out that “heartbreak” is a very real physical sensation: the pain from rejection activates your parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for things like your heart rate and muscle tension.[2] It’s natural to feel hurt if you love someone who doesn’t return the feeling. Accepting that your feelings are normal can help you process them.
  • Romantic rejection can actually trigger the same response in your brain as withdrawing from drug addiction.[3][4]
  • Psychologists estimate that about 98% of us have experienced some form of unrequited love. Knowing you’re not alone may not make the pain go away, but it may be easier to bear knowing that you’re not the only person to go through this.[5]
  • Rejection can also cause depression.[6] If you notice any of the following, get help from a mental health professional immediately:[7]
    • Changes in your eating or sleeping habits
    • Feelings of hopelessness or helplessness
    • Changes to your normal mood
    • Trouble controlling negative thoughts
    • Thoughts of harming yourself
2. Allow yourself time to grieve. There’s nothing wrong with having to grieve, as long as you don’t get stuck there. In fact, it’s healthier to let yourself be sad than it is to try to suppress those emotions.[8] Denying or minimizing how you feel — such as saying “It’s no big deal” or “I didn’t love her anyway” — will actually make it worse in the long run.[9]
  • If you can, take some time out of your life to process your sadness. This will help create a healing space for you to deal with your grief. For example: when you first realize (or are told) this person will not love you back, then you should take some time to be alone somewhere, even if it’s just going for a 15 minute walk at work.
  • Avoid wallowing in despair, however. If you haven’t left your house in weeks, you aren’t showering, and you’re wearing that ratty old sweatshirt that should really just be burnt, you’ve gone overboard. It’s natural to feel sad, but if you don’t try to get focused on your life again, you’ll just keep thinking about and loving that other person.

3. Recognize that you cannot control the other person. Your immediate reaction to learning that the other person doesn’t love you in the way you love them may be to think, “I will make him or her love me!” This type of thinking is very natural, but it’s also incorrect and unhelpful. The only thing you can control in life is your own actions and responses. You can’t persuade, argue, or bully someone into feeling something s/he doesn’t. [10][11][12]

  • It’s also a good idea to remember that you can’t always control your own feelings, either. You can work to control your responses to those feelings, though

4. Take some time away from the other person. Part of creating space for yourself to grieve and to move on is not having this person as part of your life. You don’t have to cut this person out of your life completely, but you do need to take a break from him or her.[13]

  • You don’t have to be unkind or cruel. Just ask the other person to give you a little time to get past the feelings you’re working through. If the person really cares about you, s/he’ll give you what you need, even if it isn’t the most pleasant experience.
  • If the person you’re trying to stop loving is someone that you’ve relied heavily on in the past for emotional support, find a different friend to help fill that role. Ask a friend if you can reach out to him or her when you get the urge to talk to the person you’re trying to avoid.
  • De-friend the person on social media, or at least hide his/her posts. Delete the person from your phone so you aren’t tempted to re-initiate contact. You don’t want to be constantly reminded about the other person and everything s/he’s doing. It will make it harder to keep your distance

5. Express your feelings to yourself. Expressing your emotions, rather than bottling them up and waiting for them to explode, can help you accept that you’re going through a painful experience.[14] When we experience loss or disappointment, it’s natural to have trouble dealing with it, at least at first. Don’t belittle yourself for feeling this way or try to ignore the feelings in the hopes they’ll go away. Express them openly and honestly.[15]

  • Cry if you want to. Crying can actually be therapeutic. It may reduce feelings of anxiety and anger, and can even reduce your body’s feelings of stress. If you want to grab a box of tissues and cry your eyes out, go for it.[16]
  • Avoid violent actions such as screaming, shouting, punching things, or breaking stuff. While this may “feel good” at first, research suggests that using violence to express your anger — even towards an inanimate object — can actually increase your angry feelings.[17] It’s healthier and more helpful to reflect on your feelings and examine why you feel this way.[18]
  • Expressing your emotions through creative pursuits, like music, art, or a favorite hobby, can be very helpful. However, it’s a good idea to stay away from things that are very sad or angry, such as death metal music. These may actually make you feel worse when you’re feeling down.

6. Realize that you are better off. It doesn’t matter how great the person is, if s/he doesn’t love you, you could not be happy with that person. It’s very easy to idealize someone, especially if you have invested a lot of energy in falling in love with him or her. Stepping back to examine the reality — without being cruel or judgmental — can help you get some distance from that feeling of unrequited tragic love.[20]

  • It may also help you to think about the aspects of this person that would have created a difficult relationship between the two of you.[21]
  • For example: maybe their extreme social anxiety would make it nearly impossible for them to give you the validation you need in a relationship.
  • Studies have even suggested that acknowledging negative things about the other person can help you get past romantic rejection more quickly.[22]
  • Don’t fall into the trap of saying mean things about the other person to make yourself feel better, though. Ultimately, this type of thinking can make you feel even more bitter and angry, rather than helping you heal.
  • Rejection temporarily lowers your IQ, believe it or not. If you’re having trouble thinking about your feelings in a rational way, accept that it may just take a little time to get yourself back to “normal

7. Avoid the blame game. Just as you have no control over falling in love with this person, s/he has no control over not falling in love with you. If you go around blaming him or her for “friend-zoning” you or thinking s/he’s a terrible person for not loving you, you’re being unfair to the other person. This emphasis on bitterness will also hold you back from healing.[24]

  • You can feel upset about the person not loving you without blaming that person. Don’t let your friends play it either. Your friends may try to villainize the other person for not loving you. If this happens, thank them for their support, but say that “it isn’t fair to blame him/her for something s/he can’t help. Let’s focus on me getting over him/her

8. Get rid of mementos. You can cry over giving up the mementos, but it’s an important step in the healing process. Having those mementos around will only make it harder to move on and that’s not what you’re after!

  • As you go through each item, think of the memory associated with it, then imagine putting that memory in a balloon. As you get rid of the item, imagine the balloon drifting away never to be seen again.
  • If you have physical objects that are in good shape, consider donating them to a thrift store or donate them to a homeless shelter. Imagine the all the happy new memories that oversized sweatshirt / teddy bear / CD will make for its new owner, and then let these new associations symbolize the transformation you’re undergoing in your own life.

10 Signs You have accepted being in an Unhappy Relationship

Are you really happy in your relationship or are you just putting up with it? Use these 10 signs you’re settling in a relationship to know the truth.

You fall in love for the first time in your life.

You expect it to be everything like they say it is in the movies.

You want it to be passionate, romantic and full of joie de vivre!

But to your dismay, it ends up seeming less than perfect.

And along comes the next person you date, and the next, and they too don’t seem perfect for you.

So what do you do?

Should you just put up with a relationship that’s less than perfect because you start to believe that you can’t find anyone better anyway?

[Read: 10 common relationship tips you hear every day that will ruin your love life]

A relationship should make you feel better about yourself.

It should never weigh you down or make you feel miserable.

And if you find yourself in a relationship that leaves you unhappy and tired, you’re better off being alone!

Why do we settle in unhappy relationships?

The biggest reason why we settle in unhappy relationships is because we’re too scared of experiencing the rest of our lives alone. As humans, and as social creatures, we constantly crave for social, physical and sexual intimacy all the time.

And the thought of being lonely makes us feel terrible, especially when all our friends are hitched with a seemingly perfect somebody.

Many relationships painfully drag themselves well past their expiration date, only because it’s so much easier to just put up with something you know than venture out into unfamiliar territory. After all, we love familiarity and abhor new surroundings unless we’re on a whirlwind adventure or a vacation.

The hope and fear of finding the perfect one

Just because you’re living in a bad relationship doesn’t mean you’re banished into a loveless world of unhappiness. Perhaps, you’ve just not found the one yet because you’ve not been looking in the right places. [Read: XXFinding the ‘One’]

Or just maybe, you and your lover haven’t really tried to understand each other through effective communication and understanding. [Read: XXCommunicating Better in a Relationship]

Remember, you’re unhappy in your relationship because you choose to remain unhappy. It’s because you choose to wipe your tears secretly and brush your misery under the carpet. You need to understand that you’re not a failure just because your relationship is ending or going nowhere. It just means both of you haven’t been able to understand each other, or are incompatible with each other.

And the best part here is that you have a choice, an option to seek happiness and live a happy life, or tie yourself down to a rock that you know will eventually sink to the bottom and drag you with it. [Read: XX7 types of toxic relationships that’ll ruin your life]

10 signs you’re settling in an unhappy relationship

It’s easy to know when you’re settling in a bad romance. All you need to do is ask yourself if you’re unhappy in your relationship, and you’ll have your answer. Use these 16 signs to truly find out if you’re settling in a relationship that feels more like a burden than a happy escape.

And once you have your answer, try to work around the negative issues with your partner, or gather your courage to confess to them that you’re just not happy in the relationship anymore! [Read: XXWhy do couples drift apart over time]

Read these 16 excuses and signs, and if you find yourself using them often to console and convince yourself that you’re better off sticking around in an unhappy relationship, big chances are, you’re already unhappy and just too cowardly to confront your partner about it.

#1 My relationship isn’t the worst. You know you’re unhappy in the relationship, but you constantly convince yourself that your life isn’t so bad because there are so many others who are living through a relationship that’s much worse than yours.

#2 Not the best, but good enough for me. You’re with your partner because they’re with you. They’ve decided to stick around with you, and for you, that reason is good enough to endure the relationship, even if it means a lifetime of unhappiness and dissatisfaction. [Read: XX3 simple steps to reignite the lost spark in any relationship]

#3 I think I can work it out. You know you’re unhappy, and yet, you don’t do anything to try and fix the relationship. You and your partner are drifting apart slowly, but you convince yourself saying that you’ve seen worse relationships working out *dragging on*, so why can’t yours work out… eventually?

#4 I’m sure my partner will change someday. If your partner can’t change for you today, what makes you think your partner will change for the better tomorrow? Why do you put up with someone who treats you disrespectfully and takes you for granted when you could have a much better life, without this person or with someone a lot better? [Read: XX How your self respect affects the way your partner sees you]

#5 My time will come. You stick around with your lover, in the constant hope that you may eventually run into someone better someday. And until then, you’ve decided to weather the storm and put up with your relationship.

#6 I feel sad for my partner. You feel guilty for even thinking of leaving your lover and walking away from them. You feel sad for your partner and don’t want to hurt their feelings. After all, you know your partner would crumble without having you in their life. And so you choose to ignore them, avoid having conversations with them and just stay by yourself when you get back home. So is that really your benevolent choice, ignoring them completely instead of walking away from them? [Read: 10 signs to recognize a selfish person and 5 steps to stop them from hurting you]

#7 Time will heal everything. And just how long have you been waiting for? Time covers a scar, but it is communication that heals, especially in relationships. If you want to fix something, you need to bring all of those feelings that drove both of you apart out in the open. And in a relationship, all this starts with communication. If you really want to heal a relationship, try talking to each other openly.

#8 The sex is great. The sex is awesome, but the relationship sucks. If you’re experiencing this issue, the relationship is probably still new and fresh, which makes it easier to walk away from. Now you really need to ask yourself if you’re looking at the relationship keeping the long term in mind. Would you be happy with someone who’s emotionally incompatible with you? [Read: Signs to help you know if it’s love or lust that you’re experiencing]

#9 I’m already married/engaged/committed. So you’ve taken a plunge, and now you’ve got cold feet, or perhaps realization has hit you finally. You can’t delay the inevitable forever. And it’s better to confront the issue today than push it away for later. Talk about your differences and your thoughts with your partner, and fix the relationship or walk away. [Read: The right way to let go of a relationship that’s bad for you]

#10 I don’t want to be alone. You’re terrified of being alone. What if you break up and don’t find someone else? What if it turns into the proverbial case of jumping out of the frying pan and into the fire? This is something you need to ask yourself. Just how unhappy are you right now in your relationship? And would you rather be alone and happy, or would you choose to live through a bad and unhappy relationship with your head full of “what if’s…”

 

So are you settling in a relationship with any of these excuses?

The easiest way to know if you’re settling in a relationship is by asking yourself if you’re unhappy in your relationship. It may seem selfish, especially if your partner seems like the ideal partner everyone looks for. But at the end of the day, all that matters is whether both of you are compatible with each other.

Sometimes, two perfect people can’t come together and create a perfect relationship because there’s more to love than just perfection. In fact, both of you may be happier and better off with chipped edges as long as both of you fit together perfectly like two adjacent pieces of a jigsaw puzzle! [Read: XXThe 10 kinds of lovers that exist in the world]

It’s scary to confront an issue like an unhappy relationship or marriage, especially when you can’t predict a happy ending as an outcome of your conversation.

But confronting the issue can at least give both of you a chance to seek happiness. The confrontation may help both of you understand each other better and love each other better. Or in the worst case scenario, it may end your relationship and force you to start a new life with new hopes and new dreams.

And really, just how bad can a second chance for a new happy life be?!

Settling in an unhappy relationship may seem like the easy thing to do. But unless you fix it or decide to walk out soon, you’ll always live in regret. And one day, it may be too late to turn back time however much you want to.

How to be happy: follow these five easy steps

The key to happiness, according to the latest research, is knowing where to look. We’re conditioned from a young age to aim high and seek fulfilment in a better job, fresh achievement and further success – and yet these goals are more likely to make us miserable. If we’re driven, it may hold us back, says Dr Raj Raghunathan at the University of Texas. His research shows that supposedly successful and “intelligent” people don’t make life choices that lead to happiness. He noticed that after a reunion with his PhD class, the more visible their achievements – work promotions, pay rises, fancy holidays and bigger homes – the more unfulfilled and distracted they seemed overall.

As a result he started to research why certain psychological traits – the desire to control, to feel important, needed and wanted – are the very ones that can get in the way of our wellbeing. He identifies five key areas that can have a huge effect on our wellbeing – all of which are within our control.

Don’t pursue happiness

It’s a bit of a balancing act but we need to prioritise rather than chase happiness. The difference is crucial. Many of us believe, in theory, that it’s important and rank it above being intelligent and making money, and yet in reality we sacrifice happiness for other things. Take steps to increase the odds of feeling happy rather than obsessing about whether or not you feel happy.

First steps Recognise what makes you happy – hanging out with friends, visiting the countryside, getting a good night’s sleep. Whatever it is, make a list and prioritise those things.

Take responsibility

Never blame others for your unhappiness. Tell yourself it’s in your own hands, whatever the outcome. We have the power and ability to control our own thoughts and feelings, regardless of what is happening to us externally. Feeling in control internally is highly liberating and will make you feel happier.

First steps Arguably the most powerful way to take internal control is to have a healthier lifestyle. Start by taking care of yourself; be a little more active each day, eat one extra piece of fruit, be aware of which physical activities make you feel better and make them part of your routine.

Don’t compare

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If you tether your happiness to feeling superior to others, you’ll be frustrated a lot of the time. Even if you think you’re doing better than your peers, sooner or later someone will overtake you. If not, age will catch up. Comparisons can be tempting – we use them as a way to try to motivate ourselves; one way to fool ourselves about succeeding is to think, “I’ll be the best in the world, in my class, in my office.” But you’ll find the goalposts will constantly change and, in the end, you can never win.

First steps When you measure yourself against those around you, you’ll be drawn to dwell on your own flaws. Be aware of this damaging trait and be kinder to yourself – the less you compare, the happier you will be.

Follow the flow

Most of us have experienced it, but probably not as much as we’d like; the kind of experience in which you get so absorbed you lose track of time.

Being in the moment also means lacking self-consciousness; when we’re completely engaged, we don’t care how well or poorly we’re doing.

First steps What we love to do most is what will make us happiest. Look at what you’re good at, particularly what you lose yourself in – whether it’s writing, travelling, cooking, running. Make a list and get it into your routine.

Trust strangers

The more we perceive we can trust people we don’t know, the happier we’ll be. The happiest countries and communities are those that feel they can trust the citizens around them. It’s easy to see why. If you can’t trust your taxi driver to give you the right change, or the postman to drop off your mail, you’ll lose sleep and you won’t be happy. It’s one thing to trust friends and family, but having faith in strangers is an indication of how much you’ll trust life in general.

First steps Start by being more open; talk to one stranger each day – in a shop, at work. Focus on the positive aspect of talking to people you don’t know; not the fear that you can’t trust them.

How to Pick the Right Wife

You have two options: You will get married or you won’t get married. If you will get married then this article is for you. We will not review whether or not you should get married but we will review how to pick the right wife.

Picking the right wife is of utmost importance. Marriage is a life-long commitment and requires a great deal of forethought. Getting married without a plan and without any forethought is a terrible decision.

Getting married is a business decision. Marriage is a contract between two entities. You’ve got to enter into it with the ruthless mind of a determined businessman for it to work.

You’ve got to pick the right wife like a businessman picks a company to invest in. It shouldn’t be left to chance (“love”) – you’ve got to be pro-active, know what you want and then go after it.

Marriage isn’t about love or connecting with your soul-mate. Those are inventions of TV and movies. Marriage is an exchange of resources. Your wife shall provide A and you will provide B. If your wife doesn’t, or won’t, provide her share then she should not have the privilege of marriage with you.

Marriage is a contract and you’ve got to try your hardest to make sure that contract is reinforced. You cannot make the best decision when you’re emotionally love-sick like a 16 year old school girl. No businessman who wants to stay in business will sign a contract in an emotional state of mind and no man who wants to stay married will sign all of his power away just because he loves her. It takes rational, clear-headed planning and thinking to pick the right wife material.

There are only two reasons a man should ever get married:

1) He wants to start a family.

2) His career or political ambitions demand he has a wife (he is interested in going into politics).  We will not talk about this except to say that a political wife is for show and show only. For this article we will assume the reader falls into the first category.

There is absolutely no other reason to ever get married. Love is not a reason to get married. When you get married you sign all your power over to your wife – it must be of some benefit for you to do so. That benefit is to grow old with your family.

The goals of a marriage should be:

1) Minimize the chance of divorce theft and child robbery.

2) Maximize wife’s happiness with her wifely and motherly duties (the complete opposite of everything you will see, read or hear). It’s not about empowerment (or any other buzzword designed to kill the traditional family), she should be completely devoted to her family. True happiness for a woman comes from her family, it does not come from her career, or her “independence”, or her sexually liberated point of view.

3) Have a healthy, happy family with well educated, respectful children – non-sissified sons and girlish daughters with strong family values.

Be honest about what you want:

Most men don’t want an “independent, empowered” woman. That’s code for bitchy slut with a chip on her shoulder.

We all want a sweet, nice, joyful, feminine woman who treats her man like a King.

Bullshitters will suck up to the dregs and say the opposite in a futile attempt to get some action. These poor suckers get shit on the most and never understand why. Hear this gentlemen – women love men who go after what they want, who don’t take a woman’s BS seriously, and treat her like a woman, not like a man in drag. Women hate suck-ups as much as they hate stepping in dog poop on the street. To a woman, a male suck-up is less than human.

Divorce:

There is no denying that marriage is a very, very bad deal. When you get married you immediately give your wife all the power over your money and your children. “No-fault” divorce really means “his-fault” divorce. If your wife is to decide she wants a divorce she can have all the benefits of being married and none of the drawbacks. Divorce is theft from the man. It’s a redistribution of wealth from men to women. She can live off of your paycheck via alimony and child support and she can keep your children and raise them in a single-mother or step-daddy household. She has the complete and full support of Papa Government behind her. In the eyes of the law she can do no wrong and you can do no right. And there is nothing you can do about any of that. That’s why you have to choose the right wife in the first place to eliminate much of that risk.

Steps should be taken to minimize the chances of divorce. You must take extra special precaution to choosing the right wife so you can avoid the possibility of a financially devastating and family ruining divorce.

When to get married:

The best time for a man to get married is after 30 years of age. At that age he has had a long time to live life, earn money, think of what he wants in a wife, and settle down a little bit. The ages of 20-30 are the wild years but after the 30 year mark men will tend to settle down. Most men under 30 years of age aren’t mature enough to make the best decision about who to spend their life with.

Now remember, 30 years old is the starting age to think of marriage. That doesn’t mean you should get married at 30 or by 30. Anytime between 30-45 is a good time to tie the knot. Between the ages of 30-45 is when a man’s marriage value is at its highest.

We have spoken about the need for a good woman here. In the following section we will look at how to determine good women from bad women.

The top 12 rules for picking the right wife to maximize a happy life and minimize the chance of divorce…

1) She should be young.

The woman should 30 years of age MAXIMUM. 25 is even better and 20 is the best age.

A woman’s body does not age well. You want the most amount of years with your wife having a tight, young, firm body. After 30 it goes downhill fast. At around the age of 31 a woman’s beauty really declines fast.

It’s a tradeoff, she gives you her good years and you put up with her in her bad years. Never take a woman already in her bad years.

Women do not age well. “Cougars”, older women that younger men find irresistible, are an invention of the movies. Single women over the age of 30 have wasted all their pretty years having a lot of random sex and now they want to find a sucker who will take care of them without having to give him any of her good years. Don’t be that sucker.

A young body is especially important for bearing children. Old women cannot have and don’t have healthy children. At 30 years of age a woman is already 15 years past her child-bearing prime.

But I like talking to smart women. 20 year olds are stupid.

Her IQ won’t grow much with age. A dumb 20 year old is a dumb 30 year old. The difference is that the 30 year old dumb woman is a lot more bitter and has a whole lot less to offer.

2) She has to come from an intact family with original mother and father.

No step-mommies and step-daddies. Children from single mommy homes cannot be healthy. A mother simply cannot raise healthy children alone or with step-daddies. You want an emotionally healthy wife. Women who grew up with divorce have too much baggage, use sluttery as a way to get attention from daddy, and will not know how to act in a proper family setting.

3) She cannot believe in divorce or even imagine getting a divorce.

If she mentions the word ‘divorce’, what to do in case of divorce, praises a friend who got a divorce, or says divorce is an option then she is not a keeper. Throw her back in the water and go fishing some more.

To make a marriage work, both the man and wife must think of divorce as no option at all.

4) She must have the natural body type you prefer.

Every woman will gain a few pounds when they settle with a man. It’s unavoidable. What is unacceptable is a woman blowing up to whale proportions. If a woman was once very fat, lost the weight on crash diets and ultra-gym sessions, that weight will ALL come back plus more when she gets married.

If she has to constantly diet and go to the gym she is about to blow up like a balloon when the ring is on her finger and the vows are spoken.

You must pick the natural body type you like. That means she must have the same body type her whole life, never yo-yo’ing up or down in weight.

She should have a pretty face. When her body goes the only thing that will be left is her face and you will have to see it every single day.

5) She must be image conscious.

A woman who gets pig-fat after marriage is a disgrace to herself and her family. She must be aware of her image and keep her body trim for you. Women will always gain a few pounds after marriage, but there is a difference between a few pounds and one hundred pounds. Take a look at all the women in her family, if they are all pig-fat it’s a good idea to walk away as fast as you can. You will have to see your wife daily, you don’t want to be thinking about skinning some bacon off of her back to cook breakfast.

6) She must be family oriented and not career oriented.

This is going to be the mother of your children and the keeper of your house. An Ass-kicker doesn’t need two incomes, he can provide, what he needs is a keeper of home and heart.

Two income households leave the raising of their children to expensive day cares and schools, and then mommy goes to work so they can afford to pay for day care and babysitters.

I don’t want children.

Don’t get married. The only reason to get married is to have a family.

But I want a career woman.

Doesn’t matter, even if she is a career woman when you meet she will not be when she is older. No woman wants to work but it takes some of them a long time to figure that out. They waste all their youth playing/working their career and then realize what a huge mistake they made and leave their jobs to take care of their (quite possibly retarded – that’s what happens when old ladies have babies) child. How many 45 year old married female lawyers or other professionals do you know?

The women who work in middle age do so because they have no choice and they whine about it every day of their life. They would give anything to leave their jobs and take care of their family instead.

No woman truly wants to work. Work is a man’s world and always will be. A woman’s work should be in the home taking care of the home and children.

7) She must be a “good” girl.

She cannot be a drinker or a smoker or have any tattoos. She cannot have a party girl past, a sordid past, and she cannot have gone out more than a couple times drinking. You cannot turn a whore into a housewife. The more sexual partners she has had the more likely the marriage will end in divorce.

Are you saying all party girls, smokers and drinkers are sluts?

Yes.

The fewer sexual partners your wife has had, the better. The ideal wife should be a virgin. Remember: The more sexual partners she has had the more likely you are to be divorced in about 6 years and lose most of your money, possessions, and your children.

If you think she needs help or that you are helping her and she is changing then you are being foolish and you are being played. It’s going to end badly for you when you get hitched to a woman like this.

Always pick a good girl. That means a virgin (or close), family oriented, pleasant, eager to help, a smiler, and patient.

8) She must have no problem signing a pre-nuptial agreement.

A Pre-nup probably won’t save you much money, if any, in the case of divorce but her signing a pre-nup does one very important thing for you: it shows you she is serious about making the marriage work.

9) She should change herself for you.

When a woman is in love she will change herself to please and conform toyou. Her new favorite food will become steak and eggs, she will enjoy watching all six Rocky movies with you, and she will do things to please you she has never done or liked before.

I don’t want a woman who flip-flops!

A woman who doesn’t flip-flop is a woman who does not respect you.

Women are not men and should not be held to the standards of men. A man who changes his views on the whims of a woman is a sissy. A woman who changes her views on the whims of a man is a woman who is in love. She should not be degraded for that because that’s what ‘keepers’ do.

10) She must look up to you and respect you.

Women marry up and men marry down, since the dawn of marriage. If she looks down on you she will leave with your money and your children. You’ve got to be a man that she can look up to, admire, love and respect – always.

11) She should not have any children from a previous affair.

In the animal kingdom when a Lion takes over a pride he kills the cubs of other Lions.

Raising someone else’s child is cuckoldry with your full knowledge and consent.

If you raise someone else’s child you will be taking care of another man’s seedling and there will always be another man in the picture.

Be selfish and keep your wife and children to yourself. They should be yours and only yours. Don’t settle for another man’s leavings and sloppy seconds.

Here is what women with children do: They have unprotected sex with a stud, get knocked up, and look for a sucker to raise the bastard.

or..

She has already been married, had children, and then divorced the father and left.

In each case the woman is unfit for marriage.

12) She should be a smiler.

She should smile when she sees you. Her eyes should light up. She should be excited each time she sees you and reward you with her beautiful smile.

A big, bright shining smile from a pretty girl is worth more than any university degree she has, worth more than any job she has, worth more than any other baloney modern women wrongly believe makes them attractive to men.

You want a happy woman. You don’t want a frowning, nagging, pessimistic bride.

Always pick a smiling, warm, happy-go-lucky woman to share your life with.

Things to remember:

American women have been indoctrinated since birth to believe in and embrace divorce. They have been indoctrinated and instructed to believe that their feminine instincts are wrong and bad. This causes a great deal of confusion in their minds and, to put it plainly, many of them are unfit for marriage and raising a family. Especially avoid women who use psychiatric drugs and especially avoid women who go to therapy. Therapy only makes women more insane and teaches them to blame men more for their problems.

Party girls are for fun, good girls are for marriage.

If a woman cannot or will not cook daily, how will she ever care for children? She can’t. To raise non-fat children you must marry a woman who can and will cook.

As a man your options do not dwindle as you age. Your options only increase with your age and wealth. Conversely, as a woman ages her options plummet. That’s because men age gracefully, like a fine wine, and women age like milk. That’s why you must pick a beautiful young lady. It is highly advisable for a man to wait until he is a little older to get married. 30 years of age is an acceptable starting age for a man to start thinking of marriage.

Never, ever take advice from a woman on how to be attractive to women. Be nice, be yourself, be courteous, buy her gifts only works to put you in the friend zone and rightfully so because it’s pathetic behavior.

You should avoid women who have a lazy, entitled, “me-first” attitude.

Don’t let your wife have complete and utter control of the home decor. You don’t want to live in emasculation-station with throw pillows and doilies and dolls and flowers everywhere.

Men are not women and women are not men. Things that women should do do not apply to men and vice versa. Double standards exist. That’s life.

You are the leader. She is the follower. Lead her.

When she loves and respects you she will enjoy all things about you. She will not demand and nag you into changing. If you smoke a big fat cigar and your clothes smell like an ashtray she will enjoy the smell. She should want to sleep in one of your shirts because it has your smell. That’s the power you should have over your wife for her to be happy and content.

If she’s a nagger before marriage then that is a sign you need to give her her walking papers. Nothing is going to get better with marriage, it will only amplify.

Marriage should be old school traditional for it to work. Pick a non-traditional woman and have some baloney non-traditional marriage and you can expect non-traditional results: Alimony payments, child support payments and seeing your children every other weekend.

Never get married just because. Have a purpose and a reason for the things you do.

Getting married is a dangerous proposition – make sure you know how to swim before you dive in head-first.

Dealing with the one who got away:

There are over 3 billion women in the world. The median age for women the entire world over is 29 years old. There are millions of women who are possible marriage material. “She” isn’t the one or your soul-mate or other baloney. There are millions just like her. And if she was your soul-mate you’d still be together. Let her go and move on. There are plenty more where she came from.

Personal recommendation from BOLD & DETERMINED to find a suitable wife:

Picking a woman from your own country and culture is always the best solution. Unfortunately, there is wholesale, systematic destruction of marriage and family in many 1st world countries, especially America and England, which has narrowed the options tremendously. One may have a broader selection if he were to go abroad to another country where marriage and family are still valued. But, and this is a big but, think long and hard before you marry a woman of another race and father half-breed children.

Remember, it is best to marry a woman of your culture and race. If that option is unappealing for the reasons described above there is a whole, big, wide world for you to choose from.

Conclusion:

Growing old alone and with no children to carry on your name seems a worse prospect than following this checklist and picking the best wife you can.

Civilization exists because of the nuclear family. Certainly marriage has been tainted in the last 50 years, to the detriment of all, but if you make smart decisions you can cut down your risk tremendously.

If you are going to get married, do it the smart way.

If you aren’t going to get married go ahead and have a beer.

Good luck and Godspeed!